The Odd Couples

The Odd Couples
a what-if by Dot


Proof that I do take reader suggestions, occasionally.  This idea was originally from Yek Chin Yee, and I just ran with it as far as my imagination cared to take me.


Vegeta should have known better.  He shouldn’t have accepted Chi-Chi’s offer to stay at her house, but at that time he preferred to stay out of the elements, and honor demanded that he accept her hospitality.  And the woman could cook.  Damn, could she cook: at every meal, she made him dish after dish and plate after plate of mouth-watering, stomach-filling food better than anything Vegeta had ever eaten before.

So he stayed.  The longer he stayed, the harder it became for him to leave the warmth of her house, her food, and her kindness.  And then one day, he discovered that he was forever bound to Chi-Chi as her mate, and she to him.  When he explained this to her, she accepted it—but insisted that they ‘make it official’.  To humor her, Vegeta went through the strange ritual she called a wedding.  A few months later, much too soon even for a Saiyan, their first child, a daughter, was born.  Vegeta named her ‘Midori’, just as acceptable acceptable a Saiyan name as a Human one.  It seemed to him that he was always now compelled to compromise with others.

“Vegeta-saa!”

Vegeta snapped out of his trance.  “Hmm?”

“Will you please watch Midori-chan while I go shopping?”

Vegeta sighed; he had wanted get a good workout in the hours of Chi-Chi’s absence, but now, that would have to wait.

“All right.” He took his daughter from her mother’s arms and marveled how much the two looked alike: only her tail served as a reminder of her father’s contribution to her genes.

“Thanks.” Chi-Chi gave Vegeta a light kiss before heading out.

Vegeta sighed again.  His younger self would have laughed at a warrior who bent to the will of a woman; now, the former Saiyan Prince knew better.  Such was the price of love.

~ Wife Swap ~

“But Son-kuuuun!” Bulma wailed, using her husband’s pet name in hopes that she could change his mind.

It didn’t work.  “Sorry, Bulma-san,” Goku apologized in his sheepish, happy-go-lucky voice that made it virtually impossible for anyone to get mad at him.

Anyone, that is, except for Bulma.  “You’re about to leave me three years, and take our son with you, and all you can say is ‘sorry’?”

“Bulma, you know how important it will be for us to train.”

Bulma knew that she had lost.  “At least come home for dinner,” She begged.

“Hm.” Goku scratched his head.  “Sure! See you tonight, then!” He tugged at his son’s arm.  “Come on, Gohan.  Let’s go.” Gohan gave his mother a “don’t worry; we’ll be okay” look before taking off with his father.

Bulma sighed; this isn’t what she had in mind seven years ago.  Back then, she still held dear those ideas of romantic love, and Yamcha by no means fit those ideas.  If she were honest to herself, she would have realized that Goku didn’t either, not by any stretch of the imagination.  Once again, though, her heart overruled her head, and she fell in love with Goku when she saw him again at the 23rd Budokai.

Chi-Chi was certainly a lot smarter for giving up on Goku back then. Bulma thought, not without some bitterness.  Chi-Chi had stormed out of the Budokai after Goku confessed that he had forgotten about his agreement to marry her.  Bulma should have clued in then and there and stayed with Yamcha, but ‘love’ blinded her to the truth.

She made Goku promise to marry her if he survived the battle with Piccolo Daiamou.  Goku agreed; after he won, Bulma discovered that Goku had no idea what ‘marriage’ meant.  Somehow, though, they managed to have a year of blissful life as a couple.  By some miracle of God, they also produced a son.  Goku named him “Gohan”, after his grandfather, and promised that Bulma could chose the name for their next child.  Bulma fooled herself into believing that she could be happy.

Then Raditz came.  After that, everything went to hell in a handbasket: the death of her husband, the ‘kidnapping’ of her son, the invasion of Vegeta, the journey to Namek, among other things.  But that wasn’t the worst of it.  No, the worst part came during the year after she returned, when she knew that Goku was alive somewhere in the universe, but chose not to come home.

And now, just as she thought life could return to normal again, that strange, polite, and shy young lady brought them the horrible message of a future destroyed by a madman’s obsession.  Goku, as usual, decided to fight it out instead of solving things by a much easier, less violent way.  So, Bulma would have to endure an empty house for another three years, or maybe longer, given Goku’s inclination for fighting.

Bulma caught herself wondering how her life would have different if she had married Vegeta instead.  She shook her head; why should she think about something that couldn’t have occurred? Besides, Goku was already her husband now; what use was there to think about what could have happened?

Bulma and Vegeta sat, and waited for their respective spouses.

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