100 Word Plot Bunnies: In Which the Lord of the Rings is Written by Someone Else

“You’re one tough nut to crack, Gandalf the Grey. But don’t worry, sooner or later they all crack.”

“My Leige?”

“You know I don’t like being interrupted, Wormtongue.”

“A thousand apologies, my Leige, but this is important. Gollum has stolen the Ring.”

“Gollum? You mean Smeagol. I thought the Nazgul took care of him.”

“Lord Sauron spared him, made him the jester.”

“Ah, yes, I’d forgotten.”

“What shall we do, my Leige?”

“Let the Nazgul handle Smeagol. I still have a Fellowship to find.”

“Very well.”

“Now. Tell me, Gandalf, what do the words ‘Baggins’ and ‘Shire’ mean to you?”


Unnecessarily Long and Tiresome Authoress’ Notes:
I really, really want to expand on this, but I’m afraid it’ll end up on the junk heap like every other massively epic idea I come up with.

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